I have never been asked to make decisions on so many issues or asked so many questions I did not have answers to.
I kept thinking, someone help me.
Before it began I knew it would happen. I knew we could open the first ever over night, Topeka warming center as temperatures were predicted to be in the negative double digits. I knew it would succeed but everyone kept saying no. I was confused. I had already envisioned it. How could it not come true. I pushed and the universe pushed back. Soundly. The opposition made sense. I was asking too much, too soon. This impulsive dream I had was just that.
It must fail.
This bothered me. I tell people I have visions of my success and they kinda just smile and nod. But I do. So yesterday I felt butt hurt like Fred Savage in Princess Bride when Princess Buttercup marrys the Prince and he stops his grandfather from reading. No no no that’s not how it’s supposed to happen. I was sure of it. Then I had a missed phone call.
A returned phone call.
Another phone call and suddenly I had everything I had asked for and wanted.
My vision told me it was going to happen but not *HOW* it was going to happen. So suddenly I was bombarded with questions on how to run an event that had never been done before and wasn’t planned.
I kept waiting for a sign or guidance and none came so I made decisions on instinct all the time saying to myself if this would just all fall apart I wouldn’t have to make anymore decisions and it could still be viewed as a success cause I was able to open permanently shut doors.
But that didn’t happen.
It wouldn’t fail. The amazing people that surround me kept me above water when I just wanted to give up. And we kept going and going. Awake for over 24 hours. People were kept fed and warm and dry and more importantly, alive.
We were exhausted when it was over but we did it. We went home emotionally, mentally and physically drained.
I kissed my wife as she left for work and passed out.
Then cruelly, when I woke up this afternoon every sadistic son of a bitch wanted to know, “when are you going to do that again?”
Check out @Silverbackks’s Tweet:
Exactly. And so many other agencies will be closed but last I checked people don’t get a weekend or snow day off from poverty.
Silverbackks goes out tomorrow morning to feed the homeless. We go out despite the warnings of brutal cold, sleet, ice and accumulating snow.
We go despite people’s sorted concerns.
We already had a full crew and I wasn’t signed up to go out tomorrow but as panic grew about this storm I got excited and added my name to the list. Now I won’t be able to sleep. I’m a boxer before the fight. I’m giddy with anticipation. For battle.
"You’re either crazy or dumb."
I am defiant.
I will help people, regardless. You can not stop me.